By Patricia A. Scheyer
NKyTribune reporter
It’s a fact that life can be hard. From birth to death every person experiences their own personal challenges; times when they don’t really know where to turn or how to make things better. Sometimes people find themselves going through the motions of life, and wondering if this is all there is.
Into this void comes a new idea, not earth-shaking, more of an older premise cloaked in camouflage; a moderate challenge for those who are looking for something different to make some sense out of things. Specifically, for men.
F3 Fitness for Men is that something – a program started by men, and geared specifically for men. The three F’s are Fitness, Fellowship and Faith.
“This was started on January 1, 2011, in Charlotte, North Carolina, when two guys went to their church and said let’s all get together and do something,” said Carl Gillman, a Regional F2 leader for the area. “They expected a few people to show up, but 30 guys showed up. So it actually started by accident, but it has spread like wildfire.”
There are now chapters all over the world. In the United States, there are chapters, or Areas of Operation, in at least 46 states.
Why has it spread like wildfire? It could be many things. If men experience loneliness, even with their families around them, or just feel a need for something more, this could be for them. In a larger picture, the country has seemed to be making a turn back to basics, to rules, to faith; to something people feel that they can count on.
“Men bond by doing things together,” Gillman explained. “Like if they sweat together, that forms a bond. The Fellowship is what makes them want to come back to the workouts. The third factor is faith, the belief that there is a higher power. That brings it back to full circle.”
He said that he has been in groups where he is the only Catholic, and others were Jewish or Muslim, but everyone acknowledged a higher power.
Gillman said he joined a group in Cincinnati, and from there started groups in Northern Kentucky. He has since moved on to help start other groups, and the Nantan, or leader. in Northern Kentucky is now Tony Hering.
Typically the groups work out three times a week, usually two evenings and a weekend morning.
Because these are guy groups, there are kind of unique, but not exclusive, unspoken guy rules.
When a new guy comes to a workout, he is the ‘Friendly New Guy’ or FNG. At some point this new guy gets in the middle of the circle and tells the group about himself. These confidences lead the group to give the new guy his own special nickname, and that name sticks, and is never changed.
For instance, Carl Gillman is Pappy, after Pappy Van Winkle whiskey, and Tony Hering is Soprano, because he is Italian and looks like someone from the Sopranos. The two guys who started the whole thing are Dredd and OBT. The nickname is based on something unique to the guy, maybe a funny experience or what they look like, or a talent or hobby they are known for. The nickname is never something the guy can’t explain in public. A guy thing, right?
But there are other things, like the sprinkling of military terms, the good natured ribbing, the ease of being with other guys, and not having to put on a front to impress somebody.
The exercises are whatever the leader of the group that day wants to say this is what we are doing today. They also have terms that the men are familiar with for the exercises. At the end of the workout, that leader makes a video of the group and their real names, and then they have a circle of trust, where there is a prayer, and then if anyone wants to share anything they would like a little help with, they can share their concern.
Three guys from the F3 NKY group who meet in Presidents Park came to the recent Edgewood city council meeting to give council members an update on what they do.
“Our goal is really to provide an outlet for guys to have a healthy environment,” said Kevin Eberly, before they showed a short video of the group. “It’s open to all men, it’s free, it is always outside. It is really fun. We utilize the shelters in Presidents park. When it’s warm we utilize the running tracks.”
Mark Wehry said the motto for the group that meets in Presidents Park is ‘president of pain.’
“I am sort of the product of the COVID era, being stuck at home, developing bad habits,” he said. “The gym required a mask, and I wasn’t going to work out in a mask, so I just stopped working out. My wife and I go to Panera every Saturday morning, and I started noticing these guys who looked kind of fit, and I asked these guys about it, but I thought the workouts were too early for me. But I liked the shirts, and I asked how I could get a shirt and they said ‘come to the workout’.”
He said he went three times a week for five months, and his thoughts went from ‘I can’t do that’ to ‘I can’t do without that.’
And he bought a shirt.
“You got a group of guys that at the drop of a hat are there for you,” he said. “It’s the best decision I ever made.”
He said some of the exercises are run by different members, and one of them has a nickname of ‘dumbbell’ because he works out all the time with weights, and he is a power lifter. Those are the exercises he leads the group in, although while he uses weights, the others use concrete blocks.
Adam Klaine said he has been in the group for a little over a year and has lost 40 pounds, but he said soon he is going to be the AOQ for the group, and that is stretching him as a man. He is excited about taking a leadership role, which he said is something he would not ordinarily have done. He is also happy about the things they do to give back to the community.
Klaine said the age group is all over the place – they have members who are in their 20s all the way up to a guy who is 70. At the Hebron group there is a 90-year-old guy who works out.
Carl Gillman said they have another facet of the organization that is a 5013c, called F3NKY Foundation, and that was formed to help people in the community. The first was a person who beat testicular cancer, but he had a tremendous amount of bills, so they raised money through a 5K run and helped that person. This year they are having another 5K run to benefit a young mother who is battling brain cancer. Gillman said they are making the run an annual event so they can make a direct impact.
The mission statement for the group is to plant, grow, and serve small workout groups for men for the invigoration of male community leadership. Another motto is ‘leave no man behind, but leave no man where you find him.’
There are goals in the group, but no one is hit over the head with them — they are very understated. In fact the entire movement is understated. There is no pressure. But this group is very definitely for men. Anyone who would like to join or be a part of the group can go to the website or they can reach Gillman at 859-412-0556.
“We do have a branch called Females in Action, which is where women can form their own groups and do what we do, but it is all female,” said Gillman. “We don’t have any of those groups here, but they exist.”
And then there are the shirts with the logos. The guys like their shirts. Tony Hering said he is usually wearing something with the logo on it under other clothes. It is kind of like a club they enjoy belonging to; similar to a Clark Kent kind of aura, where they are ready at all times to help people, or to reaffirm their mission to help each other and the community. As Gillman said, the workout is the magnet, the fellowship is genuine, and the faith is the solid ground underneath.
The guys have fun, they are challenged with the exercises, and they have a common goal of helping each other and the community.
As Fred Rogers always said, look for the helpers. These guys are helpers.
It is no wonder they keep coming back.