Habits are what we do consistently over time. Our habits can range from the particular way we brush our teeth, or the way we lay down to go to bed at night, how often and when we eat (as well as what we eat), when we go to sleep and when we wake up, etc.
Consistent behaviors are habits, but habits are also your own personal cycles of thought. The things you think about in the morning, afternoon, and evening are all a part of your habits. Your thought cycles contain your fears, your aspirations, and your daily commitments that you must fulfill.
Habits, for the purpose of this conversation are two cycles: behavioral and psychological.
We are always living in the intersection of these two cycles. There is no getting out from under them; humans think, and do. We don’t just think and do, we think and do the same things over and over again. Our lives are based around a predictable system of existence, and this makes things somewhat bearable in an otherwise unpredictable world. In a very real way, the world is unexplored terrain, and our habitual tendencies serve as paved roads in an otherwise confusing and extraterrestrial landscape.
This is precisely what makes changing so difficult. You are not only changing your behavior and the way you think, but admitting that the way you have been navigating the world has been wrong. You are admitting that you have been leading yourself poorly, and that you are open to a different way of doing things.
In order to change, you must know your why.
Behind almost all of our behaviors and thought cycles are either fear or dreams. Sometimes both exist simultaneously. We have anxiety about our bodies because we are afraid of becoming unhealthy. We go to the gym and eat whole foods because we dream of becoming healthier, fitter, and more capable in our bodies. We work long hours to prove to our bosses that we can handle the stress; we dream of being promoted. We lay awake at night afraid of not being enough, or not having enough, or even losing what we do have.
Behind all of our actions and thoughts there exists a why. There is a reason we are engaging with them, and sometimes more reasons than we explicitly can know. The beginning of long term change is attempting to understand yourself, and the relationship you hold with your own thoughts and actions. Your thoughts and actions, and the consequences of them, shape your world. In a very real sense that is how your world is built. Therefore, if you want to change in any way, you have to be willing to change your world.
I am going to summarize what I have laid out so far:
- Human beings think and do habitually.
- These thoughts and actions serve as road maps in an otherwise confusing world.
- These thoughts and actions have a reason behind them.
- The consequences of our thoughts and actions create the world we exist in.
- In order to change our habits, we must understand our reasons for engaging in our current habits.
- We also must be willing to admit we have been navigating the world in a way that is destructive/wrong.
Questions to promote change
- What do I think about when I get up in the morning?
- What do I do first in the day?
- What purpose do I find in my behaviors?
- From whom did I learn my habits?
- Is my current world the one I want to continue to live in?
The hope is that these questions lead you to a deeper understanding of who you are. The unbridled truth is that no one can tell you the best way to change, the best way to transform your health, or the best way to live. It is all up to you. What I do know is that as we get to understand the why behind our actions and thoughts, we begin to take more personal responsibility over our lives. As we take more responsibility, we take more actions aligned with what kind of lives we want to live.
Lee Ramsey has a passion for fitness as a way to help people grow and change into more adaptable, capable and resilient versions of themselves. He is owner of Sanctify Fitness in Covington and a regular fitness columnist for the NKyTribune.