Since I moved from central New Jersey to Murray, I have been asked how I like it here and if I intend to stay. After thirty-six years in my new/old Kentucky home, I think my intentions are clear. So last week, when a friend asked if I would talk to a New Yorker who lives in Nashville but hopes to relocate to Murray, I enthusiastically agreed.
I moved here when I married Roy Davis, a Kentucky native. From the first time we met, he spoke of his home state with fondness and respect for its frontier history.
My family’s history was in Canada and New York. I was born and raised in New Jersey, known for the Turnpike, “Joisey” accents, the Sopranos, and those dreadful harridans who claim to be housewives.
(Illustration designed by Elizabeth Bullock Humphrey, via Wikimedia Commons)
When a job opportunity opened in Murray, Roy and I got married and moved to begin our life together.
Early on, it was clear I was not in New Jersey anymore. I discovered I was a Yankee, not the baseball kind. I learned the Civil War was the war of northern aggession at about the same time I realized the statue on the courthouse lawn was Confederate General Robert E. Lee.
Alcohol could not be purchased legally; smoking was welcomed in restaurants; and coffee in the morning was not as popular as Coca-Cola or sweet tea. Many people did not lock their houses, and some left the keys in the ignition of their vehicles in parking lots and strip malls. Having a “foreign” car meant that local service and repairs were not easily available.
I never quite knew how to respond to the question, “Where is your church home?” until I finally settled on confessing, “I was brought up Catholic,” and that seemed to change the subject.
Early in my residency here, I went grocery shopping at Owen’s Market, a former Main Street landmark. As I was paying the cashier, a young man picked up my bags and disappeared out the door.
Racing after him, I called, “What are you doing?”
He stopped, turned, and said politely, “I’m just carryin’ the bags to your car, ma’am.”
A university community, Murray offers many opportunities to attend athletic events, cultural activities, and other forms of entertainment and enrichment. City and county schools attract some of the best teachers in the commonwealth. Retail options address basic needs and dining options abound, from national franchises to locally-owned eateries.
The local hospital continues to expand, most recently cutting the ribbon on its Regional Cancer Center, and the county library has more than doubled in size with an impressive addition that opened to the public in July.
A busy senior citizen center provides services and support to the aging public. Children can play sports, take lessons, and participate in after-school activities that sharpen body and mind. There are parks, an arboretum, and proximity to Land Between The Lakes, 179,000 acres of outdoor advantures.
As a fan of the arts, I applaud Playhouse in the Park and Murray Art Guild, both offering hands-on experiences and fostering creative experiences for people of all ages and ability levels. And what would we do without WKMS-FM, our National Public Radio affiliate?
W.A.T.C.H. addresses the needs of adults with development/intellectual disability or acquired brain injury, and the Murray branch of the Center for Accessible Living offers additional support.
Need Line’s mission — “to provide a bridge to wellness and financial security through education, counseling and advocacy for the citizens of Calloway County” – is essential to individuals and families in need.
The Chamber of Commerce website lists many more positive features and services, too many to include here. But all in all, Murray is a community capable of positive change.
The sale of alcohol is legal now. A west Kentucky chapter of the National Organization For Women has formed, attracting members from the region to organize, speak up, speak out, and spark additional change.
In 2020, the Murray City Council voted unanimously on a resolution that asked Calloway County Fiscal Court to “expeditiously remove and relocate” the Robert E. Lee monument from the courthouse square.
Something that is consistent in Murray is the friendliness of the people. I witness it just about every morning as I drive through McDonald’s for coffee. When my husband was here, I also ordered a sausage biscuit for him. When he moved to the Anna Mae Owen Residential Hospice House – a jewel in the community’s crown – no more biscuits.
Now that Roy is gone, there are mornings when the first words I say aloud are, “Large coffee, 4 creams, 3 Splenda.” The McDonald’s workers are unfailingly friendly and helpful, giving me a cheerful start to the day.
Obviously, I have a lot of positive experiences to share. I have spent the happiest years of my life here and I am not going anywhere. In short, there are two things in my life I have never regretted: Marrying Roy and moving to Murray.
That is as good as it gets.
I too moved away from New Jersey, many years ago. Not for a marriage, but To attend college in the San Fernando Valley part of Los Angeles. I’ve lived in many different communities in the larger Los Angeles area and for several years in Greece and England, but for the past 45 years I have settled into life in Culver City locally known as the “Mayberry” of Los Angeles. A small diverse community of 40,000 surrounded on all sides by the city and county of Los Angeles. It’s a Wonderful Life, but I still visit New Jersey 2 or 3 times a year, To visit many old friends and relatives. I’ll be back there next month for my mothers 99th birthday. And I’ll always identify as a “Jersey Girl”. Who could resist the state that gave us Bruce! The Jersey Shore and unparalleled Jersey tomatoes! Merry Christmas to all Murray, Kentucky residents and my dear old friend and St. Francis classmate, the incomparable Constance Alexander.