“And now we welcome a new year; full of things that have never been.” R.M. Rilke
The dawn of the new year sparks self-assessments of all kinds. A fresh start for any changes, minor or major. Is this the time? How shall I proceed? What questions to ask?
Since I left the Thomas More College faculty in the summer of 1999, there have been former students who got in touch because they had a very specific request. Their question was, “How will I know when it’s time to move on from this teaching position?”
Unbeknownst to me, they had followed my career changes and thought I might have some
experience to share. As always, they sought specific examples.
After the first time it happened, I decided to put those experiences into a piece that might help as a written version to follow-up, support for our conversations. It follows.
• • •
There was a time many years ago when I started to ask myself two questions: How will I know that I’m where God wants me to be? How will I know that I’m doing what God wants me to do?
It was a time of many appealing options, with attendant uncertainties.
I needed some counsel. A friend suggested a small book. I got the book and zipped through it. No help. Perhaps I read it too fast? But the second reading still had no answers.
I must have continued sharing my frustration because someone finally suggested that I see Father Rooks who was the Provost at TMC. He hadn’t been there when I was a student at TMC but I felt comfortable as an alum making an appointment with him.
He saw me right away. His office was quiet and orderly without the usual collegiate bustle.
“How may I help you?” he asked.
I told him my two questions.
He replied immediately. He said that I will know because the Peace of God will fill me and surround me. The Peace will affirm and confirm. He added that it might not be “where” I might have imagined or “doing what” I might have imagined but the Peace would be undeniable and overwhelmingly positive.
I had my answers.
That very short appointment and information would carry me through the ensuing years and years through today providing endless practice.
Joy and comfort come in having such Peace in “up times and down times.”
Often there is something for me to learn or understand.
So how does it work? For me, it takes a minute or two of quietness, then mentally sharing my thoughts with God, a conversation really, followed by being silent enough to be aware of God’s direction. As I go through my questions or ideas, the Peace comes or doesn’t come.
Maybe the time isn’t just right. Even if patience is needed, there is Peace to wait.
If Peace doesn’t affirm, I’ve learned to release that focus for the time being. That is peace of another kind but welcome, to be sure.
I’ve never been particularly known for patience. My husband of sixty-three years can tell the difference between my peace and the Peace. Evidently, that Peace is quite noticeable.
Sometimes an idea comes from the cosmos bringing its Peace along. Hmmm.
And now there are so many examples. Life brings lots of practice, doesn’t it?