By Barry Dunn and Shannon Moody
Special to NKyTribune
In a moment, so much can change in a family’s life.
A last-minute work schedule change that leads to relying on an unsafe babysitter. An unsupportive reaction from a bystander that could have been a connection point for support and kindnessrather than further shame and frustration. A busy morning withmedications left unattended and the toddler reaches up on the counter. A job loss that led to a relapse for a parent who struggles with substance use.
Or a knock on the door from child protective services following up on an accusation of maltreatment.
Kentucky families face these real-life moments every day. And, the reality is, that last-minute change, that split-second decision, that dismissive reaction can be the key to safety or harm.
The latest national Child Maltreatment report cites that Kentucky has nearly double the national rate of child victims of maltreatment, with babies and young children remaining as the most vulnerable. It’s our tendency to think of those tragic child abuse cases featured on the news – but, when you further break down the numbers, over half of those substantiated cases were categorized as neglect.
These families face substance misuse, domestic violence, and economic stressors – all leading to deepened parental stress, mental health concerns, and unstable living conditions.
Kentucky’s Child Fatality and Near Fatality External Review Panel’s latest report further extrapolates the state of child safety.The most common cause of child deaths or near deaths in Kentucky: neglect due to access to deadly means or supervisory neglect, such as unsafe storage of firearms or of medications or illicit substances that then led to a tragedy.
In nearly three-quarters of the cases reviewed, the family faced financial issues, and over half had substance misuse present in the home and two-thirds had a history of DCBS involvement.
As business and faith leaders, elected officials, health providers, educators, and just as good neighbors, we can play a role in supporting families in those moments of need and in all of those moments that lead to it.
What does that look like in practice?
Most clearly, direct support, such as food and child care assistance, are proven to make a big difference in promoting well-being. When a family’s basic needs are met, parental stress goes down and child safety goes up – bottom line.
If we know this and have a commitment to preventing child maltreatment in the Commonwealth, we must not jeopardize access to these critical supports for working parents struggling to make ends meet while juggling child rearing. For example, support in accessing safe child care is a “moment” that can prevent an incident of preventable abuse with an unsafe babysitter.
Next, when looking at the child maltreatment and fatality data, we can pull out some key moments in which a family is most vulnerable to their stress and frustration going too far – mainly in those critical first years of a child’s life.
Babies are most likely to be victims, so let’s better equip new parents with tips on sleep safety and how to soothe a crying baby. Potty training can be a frustrating moment (or many, many moments) for parents and their toddler – let’s promote best practices in achieving that milestone. The HANDS home-visiting program and other voluntary parenting education courses can be a helping hand for parents to strengthen theirskills and knowledge on developmentally appropriateexpectations for their young children.
Finally, when faced with challenging moments or even in those moments of joy that should be celebrated, community connection can make the world of difference in a family’s well-being. Parenting is tough, but everyday connections can reduce stress, isolation, and feelings of judgment or shame.
Connection is a small investment in time that can have a big impact. Consider helping a parent with their hands full of groceries and buckling seatbelts by returning their cart to the corral. Try sharing words of encouragement, not advice, to a parent at a park who is keeping their patience as their toddler tantrums.
A simple “you’ve got this” to a parent can turn a stressful moment into a moment of connection and relief.
As Child Abuse Prevention Month comes to a close, the Kosair for Kids Face It Movement encourages each of us to find those moments to offer support and connection so when those tough moments arise, families have resources, skills, and community to lean on.
Imagine how that can change a family’s life.
Barry Dunn is president and CEO at Kosair for Kids, the founder and funder of the Face It Movement. Shannon Moody,PhD, is the Chief Policy & Strategy Officer at Kentucky Youth Advocates.